Don’t hate
October 13, 2009
This is a jam, you know it. Just don’t tell anyone I said that
It’s my life
October 12, 2009
And I feel like I’m spiraling out of control at the moment. Remember when you dream that you’re falling and you wake up with your heart in your throat and you’re breathing in panic mode? That’s me everyday recently. So many back and forth in my mind about what is next. I have an upcoming birthday that is just haunting me, and I’m over the whole “age” thing but I just think it stinks that for the most part that day will be spent alone. I’m too new to the city to really have a “birthday weekend”. I’m considering going on some type of trip but I really can’t afford to spend money on a weekend getaway when I’m in the process of moving out and into a new place.
It’s time like these that I miss my car and Target (bummer)
What’s getting me through these anxiety ridden days? Laughter
U2 360
September 23, 2009
Even though I’m guilty of bashing U2 albums, I do enjoy seeing them live. I haven’t missed a concert since…uhmm, Zoo TV Tour? My memory is foggy, but I do remember seeing that tour. Live performances do a lot for me, which is one of the reasons I dislike Dave Matthews so much. Everyone says they’re so great live, but the ONE time I saw them, the sucked.
Back to U2, so I’m seeing them tonight and tomorrow at Giants Stadium. Tonight we have the crappy seats, and tomorrow we have the slightly crappier seats. Full reviews will go up later and of course I will be tweeting and status updating like an addict.
staying afloat
September 13, 2009
The “dream” of living in New York City was fulfilled, but I haven’t really felt good about being on solid footing yet. I was very fortunate to get work within 3 weeks of moving here. I then was able to move into a sublet situation that can be a long term thing if I resign a lease. BUT all of a sudden things have gotten really murky and I can barely think about next weekend, let alone next month.
There have been numerous times in my life where I have had to deal with very difficult people, and I usually found a way into their heart (or good graces). The situation that I’m in right now appears to be the most difficult challenge yet. So what does one do? I’m too old to be caring about whether someone likes me or not (and I’m pretty sure this person doesn’t). Though I do care about the environment I put myself in (work, life, social) and right now one of those environments is sucking my spirit.
What to do, what to do
I wish I knew Chinese
August 22, 2009
Saturdays are becoming the new “Sunday” for me. Which means that I do not go out at night and stay in and embrace the softness of a pillow and pajamas. I kept looking out waiting for rain to come down (cloudy skies) so I could enjoy some coffee while sitting near the window. I was going for a emo/goth theme here, but so far no rain. I went and had a manicure and a (gasp) pedicure! As those who know me well (and intimately)-I am really against anyone touching my feet.
So why was this day, August 22nd different?
Well I don’t know Chinese, which is basically why I ended up getting a manicure AND pedicure. During the manicure the lady was so nice, and trying to converse me about something that I could not decipher. I decided to just nod and say “yes” and smile with most of her expressions. Turns out that during the “conversation”, she asked if I wanted a pedicure.
I was a little taken back when she finished and led me by the hand to the opposite side of the salon, and onto a pedicure chair. That’s when it hit me and I thought “SHIT”. It gets even worse for me, because during the pedicure, she asked if I wanted an extra 10 minute massage (on feet) and I smiled and said “yes” because I had no idea what she was asking. I guess I’m glad she didn’t ask if I wanted a Brazilian…
now that I’m settled in
August 15, 2009
I plan to make it a more concerted effort at blogging my life away. But today is Saturday, so I’ll start tomorrow.
I am so tired, but hey…got to see DM!
August 5, 2009
So I left work yesterday with the full intent of going home. Earlier in the day I had commented about how I was skipping a chance to see Depeche Mode because I just couldn’t rally. So I left work and then I realized….”hey, you might be missing Depeche Mode for the last time EVER”. Yes, I know I said that back during the Exciter Tour (was that 2005?), but I think this time it had more validation.
So I got off the Herald Square stop and walked to Madison Square Garden. I stood in line and lucked out when a girl asked if I needed a single ticket…(score!). She ended up being really nice and we chatted during intermission, etc and it was all around a good experience. Depeche Mode was…well, Depeche Mode. It reminded me so much of what made my youth so great. I left feeling like I really should not look negatively on my youth, I lucked out. When friends of mine couldn’t go see the Violator tour, I did (thanks Mom & Dad). The first time I drove to Phoenix by myself (from Tucson) was for the Devotional tour, yeah, got lost. I realize that Depeche Mode was so much of my teen years, first love, first fan club, first heartache. Thanks DM 
It was a nice escape from reality.
Socializing, Thunderstorms and rambling on
July 27, 2009
No one could ever blame me for lacking social skills, I was socially awkward when I was younger (pre-2o’s), but still made relevant relationships in the ladders of my society (high school, etc). I hit my peak in my mid-20’s and since then I’ve been coasting on irrelevant commentary that makes me seem borderline idiotic at times (IMO).
But I know how to throw a great party and I can make most people smile, even the ex-girlfriends’ I cheated on. Because I feel I have to “maintain” some form of social pulse, I have been overexerting myself recently in NYC. It’s acceptable since I need to make new friends and socialize in hopes of finding a job, right? Yeah, not sure if it is. I’m a little socialized out, and am starting to think that I may be on the brink of a nervous breakdown. For God’s sake, I’m listening to Beth Orton while writing this…
I need a damn job, because then I’d at least be paid to socialize and be witty.
Thunderstorms rock.
